Today we’re continuing Abigail F. Tuttle’s blog on the Top 10 ways you, as a client, can help your family law attorney do their very best work on your behalf. If you’d like a refresher, 1-5 can be found here.
6. If this, then that
You know your spouse and/or the other party best. Prepare your attorney by explaining how you expect your opposition will react given different scenarios. You may be able to assist in gaining tactical advantages by anticipating reactions and strategizing accordingly.
7. Preparing for the stranger on the other side of the courtroom
Understand and believe that once you become involved in family law proceedings, the opposition, most likely someone you once loved, or still do, may no longer be the person you love(d). While you can still provide inside information to your attorney based on your knowledge of the other party (see #6), do not rely on that knowledge in any real way. The most common example I see of this is the naive client who believes that because his wife told him on their anniversary that if they ever got divorced he could keep his Aston Martin and then is shocked when that is the first thing his ex-wife wants. Do not assume that because you and the other party enter into family law proceedings amicably and faithfully promise each other it will remain that way, that it will. Emotions are tricky things in family law. Most importantly, do not rely on some agreement with the other party which has not been approved by a court.
8. Jerry Springer and Judge Judy battles are not helpful
Do not fight with the other party in court, in negotiations or even outside of the litigation. You will not accomplish anything and you will not even feel better. Do not engage. Being polite never hurt anyone. If you want your kids or your marital home as badly as you think you do, you can handle being on your best behavior, no matter how difficult. Of course, no one will blame you if you treat yourself to a pedicure as a reward or vent by singing loudly to angry music in your car all by yourself.
9. Follow court orders
This would seem simple, but it is not. If the court orders you to do something, do it. This includes anything from turning over records to following a no contact order with the other party. Courts do not like it when their orders are ignored. Your attorney can only do so much for you if you have ignored this rule.
10. Court appearances
Be early. That merits repeating. Be early. Do not overlook traffic, last minute wardrobe catastrophes, lack of parking, a long line at courthouse security or getting lost in the courthouse. Dress appropriately. If you do not know what that means, ask your attorney. One hint though, it does not mean pajama pants or ripped jeans. Finally, it is “Your Honor.” If you are addressed by the court, you call the judge, “Your Honor.” People constantly stumble when it comes to this one. Practice it. “Your Honor.”
Follow these ten tips and you’ll be well on your way to making a stressful time of life a little less so. If you have questions or a situation you’d like to discuss, please contact us. We’ll be glad to talk with you.
Abigail F. Tuttle is a 2007 graduate of the Temple University School of Law and specializes in Criminal Defense, Insurance Defense and Family Law at Weber Kracht and Chellew.
This blog is designed for general information only. The information presented should not be construed to be formal legal advice nor the formation of a lawyer/client relationship.
Marcus Coons says
I agree with you in that it is important to make sure you take the time to understand how you are supposed to dress in order to appear in a family court. It makes sense that taking the time to ask your attorney about this can help you make sure you are prepared for all that is needed to conclude your case. Personally, I would want to make sure I choose a good attorney that can help me understand what the possible outcomes are in my case and how I can get the best results from it.
Barbera Peters says
I am trying to decide if I should get a lawyer to represent me when getting child custody of my daughter. You mentioned that a good way to help the lawyer is by following court orders since it will keep everyone happy and won’t make the situation worse. That is a great tip for me to follow once I can find a family attorney.
WKC Law says
Thank you, Barbara. We’re glad this information is helpful to you. If you would like to schedule an initial consultation with one of our attorneys, please call us at 215-257-5114 or complete the form on our contact page — we look forward to hearing from you.
Jordan Curry says
I like how you mention especially in divorce cases it’s important to hire an attorney that’s experienced and trained in family ordeals and not just general law. Attorneys seem like they can help in a case being filed beforehand to understand what the desired outcome is. I will make sure to consult one if ever needed!
WKC Law says
Thank you, Jordan. If we can ever be of service, please let us know.
Taylor Bishop says
Thanks for going over some tips to keep in mind when you are working with a family lawyer. I’m glad that you mentioned that you should be polite to the other party and be on your best behavior. This seems like a good way to get things accomplished in a timely manner if you put your emotions aside.
WKC Law says
It certainly is. If we can ever be of service, please let us know. Thanks for taking the time to comment today!